You Can't Save Them All

I've heard "you can't save them all" so many times since I've worked in educational and mental health facilities.  I completely understand the frustration behind those words.  Teachers and therapists sometimes feel as if they are beating their heads against the proverbial wall when attempting to work with people of all ages!

I have developed a different philosphy:  It's not our job to save them.  It really isn't our job to save anyone, even though sometimes we believe that we can.  As educators or mental health experts, all we can do is to equip people with the tools they need to navigate life.  Many people will never be "fixed" but they can have new tools in their arsenol to have a happier and more productive life.

I had a fourteen year old client at one time who was acting out by cutting, destroying property and being promiscuous.  As we proceeded through therapy, I discovered that she had been raped by a boy at her school.  She was as resistent to therapy as anyone I have ever worked with but I continued to work with her and her parents.  The family moved away and I hadn't heard from them in many years.  I was at a book signing for my first book, "The Stardust Child" and this beautiful girl appeared in front of me.  She was in medical school, engaged and very happy.  Her family was with her and it was a great reunion!  When she had the tools she needed she was able to save herself!